EZENIEL'S PLACE: Cebu's HOTTEST Horizon 101 Condo!
EZENIEL'S PLACE: Cebu's HOTTEST Horizon 101 Condo!
Okay, buckle up buttercups, because we're about to dive headfirst into the glittering, sometimes chaotic, world of EZENIEL'S PLACE, allegedly Cebu's "HOTTEST" Horizon 101 Condo. And let me tell you, I've spent enough time in hotels to know a shiny brochure doesn't equal a good stay. So, let's unravel this beast of a review, warts and all.
First Impressions: The Ascent (and My Anxiety About Heights)
Okay, first things first: Horizon 101. That name alone screams "luxury" and "skyscraper." And guess what? It is a skyscraper. Which, for someone like me who gets a little queasy near tall buildings, was a small hurdle. The accessibility part, specifically for the main building entrance, seems pretty darn solid. We're talking elevators (phew!), which is crucial. Now, I didn't personally test out the wheelchair accessibility myself (praise the Lord for not needing it!), but from what I saw, it looked promising. I saw elevators, wide hallways, and the promise of adapting to assist those in need.
The Room: My Fortress of Solitude (and Slightly Shaky Internet)
So, I booked a room, praying for a view that'd blow my socks off. And… it did. The view from my window was… epic. You will feel like the king and queen of the world. The room itself? Pretty darn swanky, to be honest. Plenty of space, a comfy bed (extra-long, even!), and a killer bathroom. Bathroom phone? Who even uses these anymore? I mean, I was tempted to dial "911" just to see what would happen. The air conditioning was a godsend in the Cebu heat, and the blackout curtains? A lifesaver for this sleep-deprived traveler.
The room also had nice things; like, Air conditioning, Alarm clock, Bathrobes, complimentary tea, a desk, extra long beds, free water, hairdryer, a safe box, and internet.
Now, about the Internet…
This is where things got a little… less perfect. They claim "Free Wi-Fi in all rooms", Internet access – LAN, and wireless internet. The wifi did work, but it was like dealing with a moody teenager. Sometimes blazing fast, other times… like trying to download something from the dial-up era. I desperately tried to use the Internet [LAN] (if I even understand what it is, but it was not working. I was, however, able to get services. You should be prepared to have some issues, but nothing you cannot work around.
Food, Glorious Food (And My Persistent Craving for Fries)
Okay, let's talk sustenance. Ezeniel's Place offers a few restaurants and lounges. I managed to experience the restaurant, the snack bar, the coffee shop and the poolside bar. The food was generally good. I had an Asian breakfast and dinner (there were many options), and the salads were a great way to start my day. The Asian cuisine was delectable, and the coffee/tea was served often to me.
A couple of things to note:
- The Poolside Bar: This was a highlight. Sipping a cocktail poolside while staring out at the (stunning) view… pure bliss. The drinks menu was well-stocked, and the staff were friendly (although a little slow at times, but hey, I was on vacation).
- 24-Hour Room Service: This is a MAJOR win. Especially at 3 AM when your stomach decides it wants pizza.
Relaxation Station: Spa Days and Sauna Dreams
Okay, let's be real. One of the main reasons you go to a place like this is for some serious chill time. Ezeniel’s has a spa/sauna, with a spa and a steamroom. There is also a pool with a view, the outdoor swimming pool is also an option. The Spa itself was amazing.
A Few Little Hiccups (Because Perfection is Boring)
No place is perfect, right? Here are a few things that, while not deal-breakers, could use a little tweaking:
- The elevators can get a bit crowded during peak times. Be prepared to wait.
- The gym. It's there, and it has the basics. But it could use a little more… oomph. Maybe some more weights or something.
Cleanliness and Safety: The Sanitization Saga
Okay, in the post-pandemic era, this is paramount. I was pleased to see the emphasis on cleanliness. Daily disinfection, hand sanitizer everywhere, and staff trained in safety protocol. They offered room sanitization opt-out available. I felt safe here.
Services and Conveniences: The Little Extras That Matter
Ezeniel's Place offers a whole host of services, from the practical to the pampering.
- Doorman & Concierge: Always a nice touch. They're helpful, and they can arrange for almost everything.
- Laundry Service: Because nobody wants to spend their vacation doing laundry.
- On-site Event Hosting: There’s also opportunity for outdoor, indoor and even special events
- Cashless Payment: This convenience is great.
For the Kids (Or Wannabe Kids Like Me)
There are facilities for kids here. The rooms feel family friendly.
Getting Around: Smooth Sailing (Mostly)
- Airport Transfer: Available and recommended.
- Car Park: There's a free car park as will as on-site and charging stations.
- Taxi Service: They can arrange this for you.
The Verdict: Would I Go Back?
Yes. Ezeniel's Place isn't perfect. But it's a genuinely nice place to stay. The location, the views, the amenities, and the overall vibe make it a worthwhile choice.
The "Book Now!" Call to Action (AKA The Tangible Offer)
Okay, here's the deal: To lure you in, Ezeniel's Place is offering a special package:
"Escape to Horizon 101: Cebu's Ultimate Luxury Getaway!"
- Offer: Book a minimum 3-night stay and receive a COMPLIMENTARY in-room breakfast for two, a bottle of chilled champagne upon arrival, and a 20% discount on spa treatments.
- Why this offer? Because everyone deserves a little extra pampering. Free breakfast? Check. Bubbles? Check. Discounts on massages? Double check. This is your chance to experience the best of what Ezeniel's Place has to offer without breaking the bank.
So, what are you waiting for? Click here to book your stay at EZENIEL'S PLACE: Cebu's HOTTEST Horizon 101 Condo! Get ready for stunning views, delicious food, and a truly memorable experience. Just be prepared for that elevator ride… and maybe pack a backup internet plan.
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Alright, buckle up buttercups, because we're ditching the pristine travel brochure and diving headfirst into my (and maybe yours, if you're lucky enough to be along for the ride… or the mental breakdown) Cebu adventure. We're camping out (figuratively, and probably literally if I forget to book the aircon'd room) at EZENIEL'S PLACE HORIZON 101 CONDOMINIUM in Cebu City. Let's see if my sanity survives… and if I can find my damn passport.
Day 1: Arrival and the Great Cebu City Scavenger Hunt (aka, "Lost Luggage and Existential Dread")
- 06:00 AM (ish): Alarm clock. Or, more accurately, the internal scream of "I need coffee!" This is where things already go off the rails. I'd envisioned a serene morning, sipping coffee while overlooking the city from my balcony… Nope. Instead, I wake up with a crick in my neck, a vague sense of impending doom, and the sudden realization that I might have left my toothbrush back home.
- 07:00 AM (ish): Taxi to the airport. Traffic. Of course, there's traffic. This is Cebu, people! The taxi driver, bless his soul, is blasting some seriously questionable karaoke. My eardrums are already begging for mercy.
- 08:00 AM: Flight. Or, the illusion thereof. Delayed, naturally. Spend the next two hours people-watching. Observe a toddler wielding a sippy cup like a weapon. Question the life choices of the man next to me who's wearing socks with sandals. Deep breaths. Coffee. (Actually got coffee!)
- 11:00 AM: LANDED!!! Finally. Cebu, here I come. Except… wait for it… my luggage didn't. Wonderful. Cue internal monologue filled with profanity and the sudden, overwhelming urge to burst into tears.
- 12:00 PM: The EZENIEL'S PLACE Saga Begins: I stumble out of the airport, a crumpled mess, and flag down a taxi. The driver, a cheerful chap named Jun, tells me stories the entire way, including his latest karaoke performance (apparently, he's a star). Horizon 101 is HUGE. And the condo… well, the pictures online were slightly enhanced. It's nice, though! Clean, airy, and the view… OMG the view!! Okay, maybe this won't be a complete disaster.
- 1:00 PM: Settling In, and the Great Toilet Paper Panic: The condo is pretty nice, but where is the Toilet Paper!!!!!! I do a quick inventory of the kitchen, the balcony, and the empty spaces. My internal voice is screaming again. Commence the Toilet Paper Scavenger Hunt, armed with my phone's flashlight and a prayer. I find some! Victory! Feels so good to be alive.
- 2:00 PM: The Sinulog Street Food Odyssey: No luggage, no problem! I head to a local market for lunch. Street food time! I dive in headfirst, not even asking what things are. Lechon (roast pig) is on the top of my list! The crispy skin, the melt-in-your-mouth meat… pure heaven. The kinilaw (ceviche) is a revelation, and I even try a balut (fertilized duck egg). Okay, maybe one bite of the balut. It was… an experience.
- 4:00 PM: Retail Therapy (and the Search for Underwear): No luggage = desperate need for clothes. I hit a nearby mall, armed with my credit card and a slightly frantic expression. Finding decent underwear in a strange land is harder than it should be. Who knew?
- 6:00 PM: Dinner with a View (and Endless Mosquitoes): Back to the condo. The balcony is a dream. Until the mosquitoes descend. My skin is itchy and I've got about 50 bites, so this "peaceful evening" is kind of ruined.
- 8:00 PM: Collapse. I lie in the bed, defeated, but also exhilarated. Cebu, you’re a wild ride.
Day 2: Island Hopping and the Pursuit of Paradise (and maybe, just maybe, my sanity)
- 6:00 AM: Wake Up (again). The body is sore, so the alarm is a killer. Coffee is the only friend now.
- 8:00 AM: Breakfast and the Great Water Bottle Debacle: Stumble into the kitchen. Find a box of generic cereal. Discover, with horror, that I left my reusable water bottle back in the room. Contemplate life choices. Consider drinking straight from the faucet. Remember the street meat. Decide to buy a plastic bottle.
- 9:00 AM: Island Hopping Adventure Begins! (assuming I can actually find the boat). I've booked a tour to Malapascua Island. The boat ride is rough, the waves are choppy, and I start to wonder if I've made a terrible mistake. But the moment I see the crystal-clear water and the white-sand beach, I know it was worth it. Snorkeling! Swimming! Sunbathing! (Okay, mostly unsuccessfully attempting to sunbathe because I burn easily.)
- At around 2 PM: The Fish Encounter! Picture this: the best snorkeling spot. Crystal clear water. Amazing fishes. The fish get really close. I’m absolutely terrified of them, so I start to hyperventilate through my snorkel. It’s a terrible moment of self-awareness. I stop, let the fish do their thing, and actually enjoy the view.
- 4:00 PM: Sunset Bliss (and the realization that I have NO idea how to get back): Back on the boat, tired and sun-kissed. Watch the sunset over the ocean. It’s unbelievably beautiful. The moment is perfect, until I realize I have absolutely no idea how to get back to my condo. The bus ride back to the hostel is about 2 hours!
- 6:00 PM: My first Cebuano dinner!!!!
- 8:00 PM: Rest up and sleep tight.
Day 3: Urban Exploration, Temple Visits, and the Final Reckoning
- 9:00 AM: The Taoist Temple: After a much-needed sleep, I head to the Taoist Temple for some peace and quiet. It’s seriously beautiful. The architecture is stunning, and the atmosphere is serene. I light some incense, make a small wish, and contemplate the mysteries of the universe.
- 11:00 AM: The Basilica Minore del Santo Niño: Next up: Basilica Minore del Santo Niño. The church is huge, grand, and full of people. I light a candle, say a little prayer, and soak in the atmosphere.
- 1:00 PM: Lunch: Back to my favourite restaurant.
- 3:00 PM: Shopping and souvenir hunting.
- 6:00 PM: Farewell Dinner: One last Cebuano feast!
- 8:00 PM: Packing and reflection.
- 10:00 PM: Sleep tight!
Day 4: Departure and the (Maybe) New Me.
- 7:00 AM: Wake up, pack up, and head to the airport.
- 9:00 AM: Flight back home.
- 12:00 PM: Arrive and Reflect.
- And Done!
Okay, so maybe my Cebu trip wasn't perfect. There were hiccups, meltdowns, and moments when I questioned my life choices. But, it was also an adventure. I saw amazing things, ate delicious food, met incredible people, and learned a thing or two about myself. I made it in one piece with all the baggage now, so I count that as a total win.
Cebu, you were wild. You were messy. You were unforgettable. And I’ll be back. (Hopefully with all my luggage next time!)
Indonesian Paradise Found: Roemah K Villa's Ngiroboyo Sendang Secret!
So, what *is* this whole FAQ thing about anyway? Like, what's the point?
Oh, honey, don't ask. I've been staring at this blinking cursor for like, an hour, and honestly? The point is… I have no idea. It's supposed to be a helpful guide, a compendium of common queries, a… *clears throat*… *ahem*… a resource! But let's be real. Half the time these things are just an excuse to hear ourselves (or, in this case, myself) ramble on. And honestly, I'm more of a stream-of-consciousness kinda gal. So, expect tangents. Expect typos. Expect me to completely forget where I was going with this. Maybe just… enjoy the ride? (Which, by the way, is probably a rusty roller coaster with questionable safety regulations.)
Okay, fine. But like, seriously, how do *I* even use this thing? I'm tech-challenged.
Alright, alright. Don't panic. It's simpler than assembling Ikea furniture (and with fewer curse words, hopefully). Basically, you read. You ask yourself a question. You scroll until you *think* you see something that maybe, possibly, might address it. Cross your fingers. Hope it makes sense. If it doesn't... well, that's life, isn't it? Full of unanswered questions and questionable choices. If you're *really* stuck, just ask me again. I'll probably forget I answered the first time, but hey, repetition is the mother of… well, boredom, but also maybe understanding? Maybe?
What if I have a question that's *not* listed here?
Oh, you sweet summer child. That's the beauty (and the curse) of FAQs! They’re never truly “complete.” They’re supposed to be a *living* document, but more often than not, they end up gathering digital dust. If your question isn’t here, well, either I haven’t thought of it (likely) or I’m too lazy to add it (also likely). Try searching online, because let's be honest, I'm probably not the best resource. Google knows more than I do. Though, if you feel particularly compelled and have a free day or three to spare, you could always email me. No promises I’ll respond, but hey, go for it. Maybe I’ll get around to it...eventually.
Speaking of which, where do you get your information from? Are you...an expert?
Expert? *snorts* Honey, I wouldn't trust me with making toast, let alone imparting wisdom. My "expertise" comes from… well, a lifetime of accumulating random bits of information via osmosis, late-night Wikipedia binges, and *maybe* a few strategically placed Google searches. Think of me as your slightly-informed, constantly-distracted friend who probably got her facts from a meme. Take everything I say with a grain of salt. Or, you know, a whole shaker. Seriously. Double-check *everything*. I am not liable for anything you do based on this! Seriously.
Why is this formatted like… *this*? It’s a little…unconventional.
Okay, fair question. Look, the "unconventional" format is by design. I got bored of the typical, sterile, bullet-pointed FAQs. They're soul-crushingly boring! I wanted…something more. More *me*. More messy. More… real. So, here we are, with rambling paragraphs, random asides, and a healthy dose of sarcasm. And maybe a few grammatical errors. Don't judge me; the entire internet is built on grammatical errors these days! The goal is honesty, or at least, *my* version of it. And let's be honest, sometimes the truth is a little… chaotic. And that's okay! It’s more *interesting*, anyway.
Okay, fine, I get it. But what's the *actual* topic of this whole shebang? What are we even talking about?
*Deep breath* Okay, buckle up, because here's where things get… well, muddy. *I* was supposed to put something specific here... like how does a washing machine work, or, or… how to make a good omelet. But, now I just have this blank space. And suddenly, I don’t want to talk about any of that. I've changed my mind! It's a *meta* FAQ. We are talking about the *experience* of an FAQ. We're talking about the absurdity of needing to explain how to… well, anything! Because the internet is vast and filled with information about everything, and that somehow makes everything more confusing! So let's just talk about the *feeling* of being confused, of wanting to know, and not knowing where to start. And now I'm hungry. Did I have lunch today?
Are you being serious? Is there *anything* you can be helpful with?
*Sighs dramatically* Alright, fine. Okay. Maybe. Perhaps. I can offer… empathy? I can assure you that feeling lost and confused is a universal human experience. I can tell you that even the "experts" probably feel like they're faking it half the time. And I *can* tell you that a really, really good cup of coffee solves at least 50% of life’s problems. Okay, maybe 30%. Fine, 10%. But still! Coffee. And maybe, just maybe, this whole rambling mess will make *you* feel a little less alone in your own confusion. That's the goal, right? To feel a little… seen? Maybe. I hope so. Because if not, I’ve just wasted a whole bunch of time typing. And then, well… I’ll need more coffee.
So… what does it all *mean*? (And why is my cat staring at me?)
Ah, the big questions! The meaning of life. The purpose of… FAQ pages. And why your cat thinks you're an idiot. Well, I can't answer the first two. But as for your cat? They're probably judging you. They judge *everyone*. It's a cat thing. They're masters of it. Honestly, I’m a little jealous of their unwavering ability to be… well, cats. Unapologetically themselves. Unburdened by the weight of knowing. The weight of … writing a FAQ, for example! So,Book a Stay
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